Why dating immediately after a divorce will lead to more failed relationships

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So your divorce has been finalized. You are once again, single. Whether you have been married for 30 years or for a year, you most likely entered into the matrimony with long term goals of commitment and life partnership. It was supposed to be “til death do you part.” But life is not always predictable. Things happen. People grow apart. Perhaps the divorce was the best path for both of you. You want to meet someone again eventually. But jumping into the dating scene too soon may not always be a good idea. Let’s discuss why dating immediately after a divorce will lead to more failed relationships than successful ones.

When you have ended a long term relationship, say, on less than pleasant terms, you are most likely to be vulnerable. Emotions of sadness, betrayal, emptiness, and loneliness are what you might be experiencing. With such emotions running high, you may not be in the best situation to be meeting someone new. One of the worst scenarios would be dating someone to fill a void, which leads to rebounding. Whoever you choose to date deserves the best of you. Take some time to heal and rediscover yourself. Healing time is necessary. This step is vital for you to completely move on and free yourself from the past relationship. If you are still emotionally tied to the marriage, you are not ready. This will only lead to complications in any relationships you choose to pursue.

Even if you have ended your marriage on good terms, carefully consider if dating immediately right after a divorce is the best option. Breaking free from the life patterns that you have grown accustomed to will take some time. It’s a time to rediscover life as a single person. Get to know who you are without your (former) spouse. You have most likely become comfortable with the security of having a life partner. It’s not uncommon for newly divorcees to jump into relationships in search of something just as intimate and serious. But is it always for the right reason? It’s understandable that they have grown quite comfortable with the “WE-ness” of marriage. This sometimes leads to jumping into relationships too soon without gradually getting to know someone at a steady pace. And later they may discover that the person is all wrong for them. This is less likely to happen when you are better emotionally situated to “take things slow.”

About the Author: Jules Lawrence Profile Picture
thoroughly enjoys spending time researching and writing about diamonds, jewelry and pop culture! When she isn't hard at work writing blog posts for The Diamond Lining, she spends her time wither with an absolutely adorable Mini Golder Retriever: Jake, and her husband: Mr. Julia Lawrence.
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